its time to listen attentively.

okay,
haha.
i dont think i should blog anymore.
not after O's i guess.
lol!

lydia, im sorry im not listening to you, but i guess its the only way to talk to her now..

a letter to my friend.

我不明白你到底在想什么
我不了解，为什么你要纠正我犯的每一个错误。
我知道你写了封信，在你给lionel看的时候我不经意的看见了我的名字。
所以你的结论是？
短短的一封信能证明什么？the letter doesnt matter,
i thought we were gonna be okay during kaleidoscope,
i even told lydia that we were fine alr. but...
我想如果我读了那封信，咱俩之间的问题应该早解决的吧。
but i dont think i'll get a chance to read the letter anyway.

you kept your thoughts bottled up, 但你只会讽刺我。always negative, never positive isnt it?
why are u so brown? so Vietnamese~ you know i feel really offended.
好好想想你到底讥讽我多少次，可你有夸奖我吗？ 但你应该知道我要的不是你的夸奖，
我只需要一些鼓励，一些关心。试问你给过我多少？我今天都快死了！你过问了吗？

i care for you, i always thought that i played a part in planting you as a seed to be a Christian,
and i really really dont want you get the wrong idea about Christianity. and i really really want you to grow up right and straight. maybe i think too highly of myself. well im not even sure about it myself, even after being a 4 year old christian. just like what lydia told me, i aint mature enough as a christian.
and what about u? you are not even a 1 year old.. and you dont even say grace before having lunch, and you said you were not used to it. i hope you does now.
so the conclusion is, im not trying to make you feel that you're not right about the things you learnt in church, neither was i trying to embarrass you.
you are a smart girl, thats why it might be hard for you to accept that you were wrong.
so yea, im sorry if i offended you, and obviously you were offended.

你也知道我俩都有错，既然你知道，为什么不去纠正？so you want me to apologise first?
just tell me。
no one is gonna do anything about it?
then you are really wrong.
i always wanted a talking session with you,
and i thought the letter from you could solve most of our problem.
and it shows that you have at least tried to solve our problem, though i dont really know whats in the letter,
hopefully it isnt about something negative.

i know you know i tried to deal with the situation that im in,
didnt you know what i got for my mid-years?
and its partly bcuz of the unsteady friendship i had and the 打击s i've received from it.
and im not blaming you here okay?

thats why i didnt really wanna bother about our friendship anymore,
i dont wanna affect my studies.

you know what happened between you and Am,
who's fault was it?
and every time after the fight, you guys seems to be even closer.
isnt it the same between us?
aint we having problems too?
but if no one is gonna do anything about it,
we'll never get closer.
right?

i could have been more mature than this.
im not responding to the surroundings like a 17 year old,
i aint mature enough as a Christian,
i need to grow more.
i must grow more.

i love you, lydia.

yea
yea
i gonna obey whatever you said,
you are always right.
i tried to work things out, i really did,
you are the one who wants to walk separate way,
dont you remember how u got urself into the situation that you are in now?
how awesome for you to say that you are always right.
wth.

i wanted this blog to die off.
i guess i cant, maybe its the only way 把我的心给说出来。
so i hope you'll read this.

well i guess you were talking about me on your blog today.
i hope it is, at least i get to know that you still care.
and so happened that i read it today, and i was thinking about you just before this, so i think its His will for me to see this. and now i hope that He will somehow bring you to my blog.
can we ever get back to how we used to be?
well i dont know.
i certainly dont.

this is the second time im trying to solve our problem through blogs.
i guess the first time didnt work out as how it should be.
and since then, we were never close.
i dont know how to solve our problem.
well since you are so smart i guess you should think of one solution, if u still care.
or maybe there's no point for you, Am is enough for you.

maybe we are not suitable to be best friends?
you have everyone now, and i lost all of them, most, and y ou know why?
i dont even feel like going close to you during dance.
i dont even feel like going for swimming cuz you will be there!
you understand me?
im trying to avoid u!
i feel uncomfortable when you are around bcuz you are not you anymore!

where did my best friend go to ? where is that ignocent little girl?
where is the friend who cared so much about me?
i straint my leg, you didnt care at all?!
i only see a stranger who .... i dont wanna talk about it.
maybe its just you who changes with your surroundings.

or maybe its me.
you are so good and im not worthy enough for you.

i want to leave it to God.

toodles blog,
shall see u after mid year exams.
jiayou zhangyi,
God bless:)

oh
gosh i just realised that i didnt manage to control my temper again.
whats happening to me?
im really sorry bean curd,
i shouldnt have post that ysd.
Lord,
please help me to control it..

wtf
i thought u called me to talk to me
i thought u knew what happened to me this few days and try to comfort me
i thought u knew i had a bad day
and guess wat.
u called me to blame me for telling someone ur link
and tell me u dont like it,
and kept repeating that u told me not to tell anyone,
i dont think u did,
i cant remember at all.
u wrote it on ur blog in the beginning,
but what made u think that i actually saw it?
why should i check ur blog and remember every single thing u wrote on ur blog,
when u dont even know my latest post( 2 weeks ago)
what kind of best friend are u?
wth.
and even after i told u tat i didnt know i shouldn't tell anyone,
u still keep repeating that u did tell me,
guess what,
im having a bad mood now,
i need a friend to talk to,
and i was expecting u to comfort me,
i was expecting a listening ear
even my normal friends knew wats happening,
and u dont,
cuz u didnt care,
u didnt wanna care anyway,
im not even important to u now huh?

and wat?
u left ur e-dic on my table,
i didnt leave it in the classroom,
i even brought it home for u,
so that u wont lose it.
and what did i get?
blaming, scolding
" why u nvr tell me?!"
" u didnt ask."
hello?
its ur stuff,
who's suppose to take responsibility to it?
me?

ok fine,
im sorry.
i feel really bad,
after u called me,
and i got scolded.
fuck.
thank you very much.



我变了
变得太敏感
变得无理取闹
变得自私骄傲
变得死爱面子
变得太过分
过分到了连我自己都承受不了的地步
更别提我身边的人了

是因为压力太大？
是因为妈妈不在我身边？
是因为环境变了？
是因为我太过寂寞？

借口.

为什么?
我以前不是这样的呀！
为什么?
是自控力变弱了吗？

我会尽量控制自己
我会尽量弥补我所做过的一切

对不起
我只想说声对不起
原谅我
好吗？

Lord, help me...

Isaiah 40:28-30 " Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creater of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired and weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

i didn't know u guys are so good at insulting.
oh, did i spell 'insulting' wrongly?
how to spell 'embarrass'?
how do u spell 'disappoint'?
im so glad that u said it out loud in front of the english teacher and the whole class,
im glad that u even realised that my face was red, not only bcuz of my sun burnt.
i guess i should just treat it as an encouragement,
so that i will improve my english someday.

teacher, i guess u should give me some spelling tests,
u will laugh ur head off,
i dont mind:)

oh, can someone help me check if my sentence structures are wrong?
u know i've been learning english since i was 11 years old.
and im still having problems translating chinese sentences to english ones.
u wont even understand my essays.
go ahead and laugh out loud,
i wont feel embarrassed at all:)
oh yea, he came 6 years ago from thailand and his english standards is like 2 times higher than mine now.
i guess u will be shocked if u got to know that i had an A for PSLE english!

the newspaper article is just some crap ok?
it cant be true,
why in the world would zhangyi bother to stop having her dinner just to check the dictionary??
why in the world would zhangyi memorise 6 vocabs per morning while walking to her primary school?
how in the world did zhangyi get into xinmin?
the standard of xinmin is way too high for her!
oh, she DSA-ed.
and how did she survive till now??
by the way,
would she even know the meaning of Direct School Admission if no one told her abt it?

well i suggest she should have go back to china,
singapore is not a suitable place for her, xinmin is not a suitable school for her.
the standards are way too high for her.
she cant even write an essay properly..
and even after 6 years, she's still unable to speak in english in a proper way..


妈，我来错了吗？
也许我并不适合这里,
或许我并不应该来这里...
im sorry mum,
i guess im just another disappointment...

oh i almost forgot,
Khoo Yong Guan is an awesome captain!
you rock!
God bless!

sports day, 28-march-2010
Jaguar, third
its not the end of the world,
no sign from God.
THEREFORE,
Jaguar shall get FIRST in 2011!
all jaguar members and i will try our best to make it happen!
and its a PROMISE!!!

well, my timing for 100m is getting lousier
why will this happen?
grow fat lor!
never train for speed lor!
never try my best lor!
sydney lor! haha kidding uh sydney u better dont angry if u see this.
if not YG will kill me!
anyway congrats to sydney!
u won the 100m race! out of the 48 girls from the 4 houses.

sec 1 i had 3 gold
sec 2 i had 2 gold, 1 silver and 1 bronze
this year walao ey! 1 gold, 1 silver and 2 bronze..
dont tell me next year no gold uh...
well it actually doesnt really matter,
as long as Jaguar gets First!
everything else will be all fine:)

hrm...
sun burnt
i guess its the worst sun burnt i have ever had after coming to singapore.
well, to wat extent is my sun burnt?
answer: u shall see tmr! (correct! full mark!)
lol!

a question to my dear friend,
what do u see urself as a christian?

i guess i have to ask myself the same question.
its time to reflect,
what did i do for Christ,
'trust, have faith, serve and love Him'
is that all i can do?

i shall continue with my homework now.

mummy,
i miss you.

ok.
mum is on the plane now.
she missed called me at 16:53 for 3 times and i feel so sorry about it.
i felt asleep on the bus. -.-
i just hope that she recover as fast as possible,
not that she can come back earlier,
well i just dont want her to suffer anymore.

she said she'll come back after she have fully recovered,
i guess mid-year exams have passed by then..
妈，您就在中国等我的好成绩吧！
i gonna prove to her that i can make it.
and thats a promise!

妈，您可要好好的照顾自己啊！
其实也好，
您现在可以好好的休息，
不用为我和姐姐操心
不用拼死拼活的打零工赚钱
不用累坏身子
妈，我爱您！

alright..
mum is recovering,
thank Lord..
but she's still weak..
so i needa cook for her and stuff.
well, its my responsibility to take good care of her.

妈妈想要回国好好休养
因为她听说身体需要很久才会完全康复
不知道要回去多久
妈,您一定要好好的照顾自己呀!

Labels: 妈, 我爱您

mum got dengue fever on last sat.
and today she got hospitalised.
wat should i do?
who shld i blame?!
THAT mosquito?!
i can only blame myself for not taking good care of her..
ALL i actually cared abt this few days is sports heats!
wat the fuck is wrong with me?!

DEAR HEAVENLY FATHER, PLEASE..PLEASE HEAL HER..

OH MY GOSH!!!
oh haha
next Saturday SPORTS HEAT ley!!
haha
woah...
i hope this year JAGUAR will win!!
haha aiya no need to hope la!
SURE WIN LA!!
so steady!
so zai!
STUPID KHOO YONG GUAN


haha
ooh gosh. next week got a lot tests ley..

能回到以前真好
没有烦恼
没有压力
啊 悠哉
好想以前的朋友们
只有他们能带给我快乐

累了
不想在继续演下去

im sry. wth.its always about u.
im sry. u r always right, im always wrong ok?
im sry.wat, now its my fault AGAIN?
im sry. oh fine, BLAME ME THEN!
im sry. if u'll feel better this way.
im so sorry.

thanks for the advice lydia.

hey best friend.
i think i wont dare to apologise to you tmr.
so i hope u'll see this today.

a conflict can only be started by two person.
if one wants to start a conflict,
but the other one treat the problem in the right way,
there wont be a conflict right?
so yea..
i think we both have fault..
and the same thing is,
we can only solve the problem together.

aiya, i donno how to say.
guess i should just talk to u tmr...

if u see this and think we should really talk,
pls sms me..

Labels: im sorry

to my best friend.

i thought u wont care.
u always take it for granted.
like Am.
i gave in so much..
i didnt let anyone bully u, did i?
why cant u stop comparing,
stop insulting me,
stop taking in and not give,
stop throwing ur temper at me!

i really donno wat u want.
im ur best friend too, rmb?
have u ever treated me like a bestie?
yea or maybe u did and now u r sick of me alr?

cant believe i red my eyes for u..

i didnt try to push u away.
i thought u dont need me anymore,
u have so many good friends.
Am is back with u,
other ppl are supporting u.
u dont need me...
right?

i know. im in fault too.
im sorry,
will u forgive me?

friends,
yea friends,
hey.

dad is finally here,
brought 大闸蟹 and 火腿肠 for me.
damn happy :D

yea,
love him no more,
但他在又老在我面前晃来晃去
他的存在让我感觉好怪`

yay!
papa is coming in 4 days!!
see ya daddy!

sorry Lord for i have wasted another few drops of tears.
why cant i control them?
wats wrong for him to say those words?
it doesnt matter anymore..
right?

oh no poor cat sure die.
cuz got an irresponsible owner.
hais

anyways,
things didnt go so well this few days.
我希望玶玶能了解我，
我们需要好好聊聊。
只愿她还把我当她最好的朋友，
朋友是不分彼此的。
oh well.
i wish i could bring her to church someday.
maybe its not her prob.
maybe its mine.
i guess i should give her some space,
dont always stick with her,
maybe she'll get irritated by me someday,
或许她早已对我感到厌倦。

好累，
好困·

prank call failed -.-

flag day.
hahaha! i think merlyn and i collected the most amount of money.
haha so pro!
and we did some super random things after tat.
SUPER FUNNY
haha im kinda lack of vocabulary.
bye

today is fun.
PE,IM TALLER BY 1CM!!!
and 1kg heavier.. -.-
danced in front of the sec 1s.
some laughed.
who cares, as long as we had our 'happy dancing'
:)

i donno,
but somehow i just feel so stupid.
i think i really have attitude problem.
i can get angry easily after this holiday.
i hope i can change to be a better person for God.
im sorry merlyn for not waiting for you.
really sorry.

well,
i tried hard to forget about him.
sometimes i really did manage to,
but sometimes i just cant control.
i guess its time to pray.

merlyn was like," hey look outside!"
and i saw him.
then i was like," aiya dont care la~"

haha zhangyi i love you.

lol.
today is tiring.
ok i dont feel like talking about today
haha bye.

i think i have attitude problem today.
anyways,
i love merlyn:)

oh my gosh!! that gay Lee.
i cant take it alr. my class ppl will know wat im talking about.
wth(eck)!!!!

haha, today is kinda tiring.
as in for dance.
i believe most of us think so.
performance on fri.
pray that no one will make any mistake.
dance like syf!!
:)

haha leotard very smelly.
and we have to wear it for 4 days.
haha smell me~
anyways,
erm,
gtg study now.
bye.

Labels: dance

once upon a time,
both my blog and i died.
and then.
HAHAHA~!
we are alive!YAY! WOOHOO~~!!
-.-lll

ok anyways,
i love yellow!!!!
sorry i was a bit random.

something happened.
i thought it'll hurt for a long time,
as in like, LONGGGGGGGGG time,
like maybe.. years or something?
but thank God im back to reality.
its doesnt hurt anymore,
cuz i no longer have to care about someone who doesnt even bother about me.
and i shall not waste my time like tat.
i have many friends,
like,
a lot of friends!!!!
to have FUN with,
and i have Jesus.
as long as He cares,
it'll be more than enough.

i think this whole shortie relationship thingy is what God wanted me to experience.
God was testing me,
(or issit Satan who always try to pull us away from God by giving me this stupid relationship?)
God gave me a lot of chances,
He passed msgs to me through my friends,
warning me a million times not to stead with someone who doesnt believe in Him.
who plays with my emotions,
like a game. like mafia war or sth?
but i did not listen!!
how did i even fall into Satan's trap?
sorry Daddy God, i should have listen to You..

please do treasure your single hood life,
cuz it'll only be about 1/5 of ur life,
and for love,
it'll be for life,
( if its true love).

haha aiya.
hey merlyn i love you :)
bye

Labels: alive, rise and shine.

haha
my blog is dead.

用一分钟找到一个特别的人
用一小时去发现他的优点
用一天去爱上他
然后用一辈子去忘记他

wat if i die tmr,
will u care?

yea, too fast
so fast tat i couldnt take it.
blue bottle would never know how much it hurts.
cuz he's just a bottle.
he thought tat its ok, yea but only for him.

sorry V, i know how much it truely hurt now..
really sorry.

its getting to fast i guess..
i have to pray about it.


wow
2 hours.
today very happy!
:)

studying is FUN!
but skool suck.

oral exam

bubbletea and bus stop!

why am i so stupid?
why cant i make up my mind?
they say," CUZ U R STUPID!"
LOL!

HAHA TAG LEY!!!
:D

haha im at IT lab now.
lol Mr Heng very good.
today qian never come skool.
so sian got to do D&T and IT all alone.
actually i didnt do anything for IT la. haha
woah they finally got my name right ley!
but,
who cares~ hahahaha zhangyi so evil.
anyways,
today spent my recess with weisze and clique,
they very funny.
haha and .... haha saw blue bottle a lot times. :P
haha bye!

yesterday blue bottle dropped on the floor a lot of times.
very funny!
then i go put some disgusting thing on his table,
utter fun!
haha now i know a lot of things alr,
very happy!
today suppose to treat blue bottle bubbletea,
but in the end he treat me.
haha peach milk tea is super nice!
i chose wan ma, of course nice la! :P
today blue bottle very shuai!
haha keep looking at blue bottle.
oops. shy le.
haha blue bottle keep talking to me.
wah cannot take it alr.
super HAPPY!!
(ey why i keep saying im happy? CUZ I PRAYED TO STAY HAPPY FOREVER AND GOD ANSWERED MY PRAYER!!! thank you Lord! Amen)
ok.
mini blue bottle is super cute.(:
bye~
oh by the way,
dear friends,
I LOVE YOU GUYS!
thanks for all!

zhangyi,
stay positive!
dont frown.
dont panic
control urself.
u better stay happy, cuz a lot ppl prayed about it!
:D

not sure if im right though,
i hope i am.
but how long will it last?
like the previous time?
10days?
but i just needa stay happy.

next week holiday.
cant get to see blue bottle.
got blue bottle's bro's phone.
haha
today after skool while walking with the bro at hougang point there,
met XH and YG they all.
woah they make fun of us like siao
then i stand far far from them.
seriously no comments.
hahaha but its fun.:D
i just hope they wouldnt think tat i like the bro XD
if not i 跳进黄河也洗不清了！

i hope wat blue bottle's bro said is true though.
at least i got wat i've been waiting for.
but blue bottle simply dont feel like telling me.
its ok.
i am happy now.

more and more ppl noe about us now.
but blue bottle dont mind.
so im ok.
crystal and joyln damn funny,
they made me laugh.
haha

and yea,
i love merlyn and amanda!

Labels: cant stop smiling

i should post.

and,and
he want my thumbdrive.
:D
i dont care i want it too.
XD
we shall take turn to use it:)
possible?

haha. now i like blue!!!

a second, a minute, an hour, a day goes by
I'm hopin' just to be by your side
I'm turnin' the handle
it won't open
Don't make me wait
cause right now I need your smile
Knock Knock
when life had locked me out
I turned to you
so open the door
You're all i need right now it's true
Nothin' works like you
Little louder little louder little louder knockin'
A warm bath, a good laugh
an old song that you know by heart
I've tried it but they all leave me cold
So now im here waiting for you
my remedy for all that's been waiting to see you
Knock Knock
when life had locked me out
I turned to you
so open the door
You're all i need right now it's true
Nothin' works like you
You seem to know the way
to turn my frown upside down
you always know what to say
to make me feel like everything's ok
Little louder little louder little louder knockin'

Labels: knock knock

today is good.
went to church in the morning,service is good.
cuz i was singing. HAHAHA
and spent time with rachel, nat and lydia.
i love spending time with them.
cuz i love them.
they rock my life.

tomorrow going to have a plaits date with merlyn.
im gonna teach her how to tie french plaits.
hahaa

anyways,
HAPPY NATIONAL DAY!!

Labels: great day

i cant live without You


hi hello
hi hello
hi hello
hi hello
hi hello
:D

我想
我念
我爱
我恋

Labels: 我难受

my hair so short now.
lol!!

today is fun.
i like today.

AMANDA WANT ME AND MERLYN TO POST ABOUT HER, AND IM POSTING ABOUT HER NOW!!!!!

i expected dance to be exciting today..
but its not.
DSAs came in today,
4 of them.
one is fongxin's sis.
so cute!
hopefully they can get in!

and bcuz of the DSAs,
we didnt really dance today
and ZlS separated us into 2 groups( partly bcuz of the stupid H1N1)
my group dance taoyao.
TAOYAO LEY!!!!
i miss taoyao.
well actually i think most of us did.
i felt great having a chance to dance it again!
performance next year will be great!
hopefully.
the other group dance tinggu( which was the dance tat a few of us suppose to perform for national day but...STUPID H1N1!!!)
so i guess we dont have to dance tinggu anymore..
through its kinda fun too.

did some 基本功
then headed home

toodles.

I WANNA TOP UP MY PHONE NOW!!!!
CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!

but..
i cant...

they said im too desperate
i agree too.
so i think its time for me to stop.
or should i not have started it?
i donno.
haha i donno wat im craping oso.
my eng it too lousy sometimes me myself cant understand it.
hahahahaha!

friendship is better than relationship!




my got my heart cut,
on the same day
they cut their hair..

Labels: yesterday

i dont wanna be one of 'em
they was like," zhangyi so horrible, go like someone younger than her!"


OH~
WHAT A GREAT DAY!
donno why but i feel so happy after knowing the truth,
im just happy..

Labels: nothing better than that

YAY!!!!!
DANCE STARTING NEXT WEEK LEH!!!!
YAY YAY YAY!!!
LIKE FINALLY CAN DANCE ALR LA!!!
MISS DANCE SUPER A LOT MAN!!
( but i dont miss zls at all.)
haha lol!
i dont miss the ping gu dance either.
I ONLY MISS TAOYAO!!!
HAHA WATEVER...

i finally got it right..

why am i crying again,
i thought i dont cry easily..

i just hope that i can concentrate on my studies..

he enjoyed his recess today,
my recess totally suck.
cuz i was just watching
him playing with them.

i hate cream.

then the younger him said,
"dont cry, i help you:)"

Labels: thanks

he said: would you cry easily?
i said: not really, unless sth really hurt me.why?
he said: that day someone told me you cried. btw, why you cry?
i said: nvm la, its nothing.
he said: oh ok nvm.

wth..


i hope u ppl reading the following post will not feel uncomfortable, if it does pls tell me and stop reading..

i hate it when ppl dont talk to each other,
i hate it when good frens or best fren stop being good frens or best frens(my poor eng)
cuz i noe how it feels and i always will.
ITS JUST HARD TO BE ALONE!
cuz not everyone noe that Jesus is our best friend and He's always there for us.
I REALLY WANT TO HELP MY NONE CHRISTIAN FRIENDS BUT THEY JUST DONT LISTEN TO ME! WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO LORD? pls give me an answer... Amen.

my non-christian best fren heard tat Christians will go Heaven after they passed on
and non-Christians will go hell
then she said sth that really put me into deep thoughts
this is wat she told me.
its alright to not to be a christian and go heaven.
cuz there are more non-Christians than Christians in this world,
so hell must not be so bad cuz so many ppl are going there and a lot ppl are alr in there.

i donno how to tell her tat she's wrong.

im really confused.

i LOVE lydia and she is awesome!!!!!!!!

( no choice la, must write, later she angry then i die liao. XP)

i prayed and He answered my prayer.
and it had been quite a period of time for me to notice how awesome God really is!
LORD i thank you for what You've done for me!
and through You,
i managed to share with my skool friends how wonderful You are!
Amen!

AND I LOVE MERLYN KOH!!!
AND IM TELLING EVERYONE ONE TAT I LOVE HER!!!!
HAHA





it started abt 2 weeks ago.
and now it ended.
fast and furious
lol
woah this time i didnt really cry
though i was really very sad.
haha fierce!
lol!


yesterday night was really scary.
went for cell until 10.45 then walk with nath to her house
and then i was rushing to take my 169 to go home as fast as possible cuz
i'll die if i reach home too late.
think i was really rushing, too careless!
so instead of boarding 169, i went up to 969!
woah i think i was really blind of sth.
after msging nath for about 10+mins
then i realised that i was on the wrong bus cuz i didnt see anything familia.
LOL!!!
and when i finally got down the bus it was in tampines bus int.!!!!!!!

so after that i went to take mrt but its alr 11.30pm and the last train was gone.
ARGHHH!!!
so after that i walked all the way from the mrt station to the bus int. ( ok actually its kinda close)
and God blessed me, i managed to take the last 22.

now comes the really sad thing..
there were only a few ppl on the bus,
me and a few othe ppl---> GANGSTERS!!!!
AHHHHH!!!!
U HAVE NO IDEA HOW SCARY THEY WERE!!!!
AND THEY WERE SITTING SO CLOSE TO ME!!!!
LIKE, ME<------------------------------>GANGSTERS.
SEE!!! SO CLOSE!!!!

ok nvm.
so after that i was like, oh my fishnuts!!!
and i was like, seriously praying for help.
and thank God i was like, chatting with my friend so at least im emotionally accompanied.
lol
and after around 30 mins, 2 of the gangsters got down the bus and a few ppl went up. and they were sitting somewhere near me and finally i was not SO scared.

after i reached amk bus int.
woah THANK GOD AGAIN tat i managed to aboard the last 269 to my house.
and THANK GOD AGAIN AND AGAIN cuz my parents didnt scold me even after i reached home at 12.40.

woah i type to much rubbish i think. but, should i say this whole thing is scary or shoik?
LOL!!!

byeee~~

i think green bottle dont like me alr.
but, well its his choice,
cannot force anyone to do anything that they dont wanna do.
smile always. :)

Labels: love cannot be forced

okay
now i got it.
so thats wat you mean.
but you should have told me ealier
so i dont have to fall this deep for you
and u dont have to be so cold......


you have a way of coming easily to me
and when you take
you take the very best of me
so i start a fight cuz i need to feel something
and you do what you want
cuz im not what you wanted
oh, what a shame
what a rainy ending given to a perfect day
so just walk away
no use defending words that you will never say
and now that im sitting here thinking it through
i've never been anywhere cold as you
you put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray
and i stood there loving you and washed them all away
and you come away with a great little story
of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you
oh, what a shame
what a rainy ending given to a perfect day
so just walk away
no use defending words that you will never say
and now that im sitting here thinking it through
i've never been anywhere cold as you
you never give a damn thing, honey
but i cried, cried for you
and i know you wouldnt have told nobody if i died
died for you (but i wont)
oh, what a shame
what a rainy ending given to a perfect day
every smile you fake is so condescending
counted all the scars you made
now that im sitting here thinking it through
i've never been anywhere cold as you

being sarcastic,
if you've told me ealier,
i dont have to buy that card that will expire so fast to just chat with you.

Labels: i dont know what to think

i need a BIG HUG!!!

ok, yesterday was fun, especially the ganna buried part.
haha, but before going to meet the rest at sentosa,
lydia and i met at bishan mrt to go to hougang mrt together to meet my green bottle
and ask green bottle to lend us a beach volleyball. its like, UTTER COOL! i think both of us are kinda shy to see each other.haha lawls!!!
anyways after green bottle passed me the ball,
lydia and i went to take mrt straight to harbourfront.

all i noe was that we were damn early,
but jessica was even ealier. haha
so the three of us kinda like, see inside the station for about 40 to 50 mins?
and the guys FINALLY arrived.
i thought guys should always wait for girls?
haha nvm.
anyway, we played monkey, rugby, frisbee( though we only have 7 ppl)
and swimming. plus digging and burying. lol!!
haha the busying part was exciting,
cuz i totally cant move my body, and my legs were totally numb after i came out
but, its FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN!
so after that we went to shower, then me and lydia partially dried our hair with the hand dryer in the toilet. haha!

then, we ate our lunch at 4+ in subway.
which is like, our combined lunch and dinner.
then we took the mrt to bugis and kinda walk walk all the way to raffles city,
and some of us were like,
LOL??? WHY NOT JUST TAKE MRT?!?!
ok so after that lydia, jes and i went home. haha
yea.
thats about it. i shall not talk abt the not happy part after i reached home.
so sad nat and rachel were not there..

haha pics time!!i'll post the video once i get it from lydia.

they were like,tickling my my feet!!! and i was like, AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Labels: i love green

well dear denise ask me to do it. then do lor..

All of the 14 people must do this quiz , unless he/she doesn't have a blog.Write the name of 14 people you can think off the top of your head.Then answer the question.
1.lydia
2.nath
3.chach.
4.mel
5.merlyn
6.amanda
7.eryue
8.peiyan
9.jiayi
10.trilene.
11.justin
12.kaely
13.peijun
14.green bottle

01 ) How did you get to meet 7 ?(eryue )
Ans: dance!
02 ) What would you do if you & 13 never meet ? (peijun)
Answer : erm, i will never noe that there can be such a talented dancer in this world
03 ) What would you do if 1 & 12 date ? (lydia&kaely)
Answer : oh gosh, lesbian..
04) Have you ever seen 14 cry? (green bottle)
Answer : er, will i? :P
05 ) Would 4 & 11 be a good couple? (mel&justin)
Answer : dont think so, they dont even noe each other.
06 ) Do you think 11 is attactive? (justin)
Answer : erm..
07 ) What is 2 favourite colour? (nath)
Answer : well she said its purple.
08 ) When was the last time you talk to 9? (jiayi)
Answer : 18 jun 09!!
09) What language does 8 speak? (peiyan )
Answer : English & chinese& malay!
10) Who is 13 going out with? (peijun)
Answer : erm, i shall ask her when skool re-opensXD
11 ) What grade is 12 in ? (kaely)
Answer : Sec 1!
12) Would you ever date with 10? (trilene)
Answer : gosh.. no way!!
13 ) Where does 5 live ? (merlyn)
Answer : i think i need to ask her..:P
14 ) What's the best thing about 3 ? (chach)
Answer : she's damn funny!!!!!!
15) What would you want to tell 10 now ? (trilene)
Answer : nothing else to say leh, u give up alr? haha:P
16 ) What's the best thing about 8 ? (peiyan)
Answer : super friendsly!
17 ) Have you ever kissed 5 ? (merlyn)
Answer : nope. BUT I WANT TO KISS HER NOW!!!
18 ) What was the best memories you have with 7 ? (eryue)
Answer :dancing tgt!!!
19) When's the last time you see 6 ? (amanda)
Answer : 18 jun 09!!
20) How is 14 & 12 different ? (green bottle&kaely)
Answer : er, they have different sex! haha
21 ) Is 6 pretty ? (amanda)
Answer : super!!
22 ) What was the first impression of 11 ?(justin)
Answer : this shark! haha kiddingXD
23 ) How did you meet 5 ? (merlyn)
Answer : dance!!
24) Is 1 your best friend ? (lydia)
Answer : Duhhh
25) Do you hate 12 ? (kaely)
Answer : if yes, i wont even bother putting ur name there! obviously dont la!
26 ) Have you seen 4 on the last month ? (mel)
Answer :dont think so.. mel i miss you...
27 ) When was the last time you said to 3 ? (chach)
Answer :last last sunday
28) Have you been to 5's house ? (merlyn)
Answer : nah.. but i would like to!
29) When's the next time your gonna see 10 ? (trilene)
Answer : when skool re-opens
30) Are you close to 13 ? (peijun)
Answer : erm.. not bad la! haha
31) Have you been to a movie with 4 before ? (mel)
Answer : i dont think so...
32) Have you ever gotten into trouble with 8 ? (peiyan)
Answer : Lets try... haha kidding!!!
33) Would you give 2 a hug ? (nath)
Answer :yup! totally!!
34) When have you lied to 3 ? (chach)
Answer : erm, cant rmb..
35 ) Is 1 good with socializing ? (lydia)
Answer : now yes!! haha

oh my gosh, im actually posting.
lawls!
i think i shall just update the things that happened during the period of me not posting.
haha^^
lets see,
oh, i've not been posting for one month!
so cool,
i shall break a new record, maybe 2 months?
haha lawls!
dance camp and adventure camp rocks a lot.
dont really have any pics for both of the camps.
but good memories.
adventure camp ended,
a new green adventure began.
its okiiee if u dont get it.
just needa noe that admiring and liking someone is way different.
erm yea.
that's about it.
sister just came back,
now dad is coming to s'pore soon!
with my new sports shoes [i spoiled the old one (that had been with me for the past 4 years) during adventure camp]and a laptop(from dad, for my birthday as promised) and its super nice and cool although i have not really seen it yet, just viewed a few pics of it from the internet.
and it costs a lot...-.-
anyways,
i kinda want skool to open soon, well it'll start soon anyway.
will get to see old friends, new friends. lol
the main thing is if they would want to see me.
haha life is still kinda bored.
but i really gotta work hard in this coming semester,
streaming. dont work hard oso cannot. or else there's no point buying the laptop for me i guess.
i will not even have the face to use it if i did badly for this end of year.

kinda miss my church friends.
seriously miss them.
miss our happy times.

thats it woman.
byee~

Labels: i love green

well this time i did very badly for my mid-year Exams..
奶奶,妈妈,爸爸,爷爷, 我对不起你们
this time i only have 1 A1
even higher chinese i only got an A2
wat was wrong with me?!??!?
so wat if i got a first in class for chinese??
no point getting an A2 wat
havent dare to tell mum abt my results.
she asked me about it yesterday but i told her i'll only receive my results on monday..
wat a liar.
think i'll go hell...
i think mum will be very sad,
even though i promised her i'll do better in end of year.
i can no longer upset her like that anymore.
maths, C6..
grandma was a maths teacher,
i promised her that i'll do well before she pasted away,
see, i cant keep my promises..
i suck!

and im kinda like,
longing for friday.
do i really wanna see them?
oh yea, im just going there for
fellowship
i dont want a bdae surprise,cuz i dont deserve it,and they r not gonna mean it
its not gonna be done only for my bdae,
its just for the sake of showing others how caring they are,
isnnit?



happy bdae to me
happy bdae to me
happy bdae to me~~
happy bdae to me!
wooohooo sweet 16!!!
but no longer 15..sadded
and im older..
older..
older.. older...older..
okaye watever
AND I LOVE AMANDA HOO ,MERLYN KOH, LIM PEIYAN,BRO,PARTNER,PPL SITTING BEHIND ME, AND DANCERS! and class mates. AND XXON YOUTHS!
photos coming.. okaye~ just watch and be jealous! haha

presents i received tday. not much, but very meaningful

Labels: sweet 16

this is wat i got from my dear yhcahc.
those that i [ ] and coloured will be wat i think oso.

[I hate this.]
[I hate school] so much, its unbearable.
I hate everything.I don't [like everybody]anymore.
[I wish i was seven again],when i had no friends(yes, that's how bad my social skills were)
I just went home and ate and slept and watched tv.
[No problems,]
[No worries,]
No studies.
[Just family] and cousins.
[That's all I had.]
I never mixed around, everyone was stupid to me.
I preferred being alone,
[I still do.]
Argh whatever,when did my mouth open up.
Don't [talk to me if you see me.]
I'd rather not, unless.

while zy added,
i love friends.
i need friends
i need a true best friend
a best friend who cares about me
a best friend who noe whether im angry, sad or happy
a best friend who noe wat i truly want
a best friend who forgives me when im wrong
a best friend who thinks about me when she's free
a best friend who would bother to change for me
i need wat i had,
not wat i have now.
i need my best friends back.
izzit my problem that i lost my best friends?
or its just wat God want me to face so that i can learn?

i love my family.
the 5 family members that i had.
now only left 4.
i love my mum,
she suffered for us
she cannot stay with her husband just because of us coming to s'pore
she cannot stay with her parents and friends just because of us coming to s'pore
she cant rest like a normal mum, she needa work to feed us
she's the best mom in the world!
i love my dad,
he suffered really a lot
he cant have his wife with him just because of us coming to s'pore
he cant have his only 2 daughters with him just because of us coming to s'pore
he's along at home now,
grandma passed away,
grandpa staying in ([retired teachers' home]- a place where retired teachers stay without family members dad said he'll buy me a laptop.
i noe its hard for him to afford but..
i love grandma
i love her teaching me math
i love her scolding me cuz i score 94/100 while i should be able to get 97 or even full marks when i was p4 in china
i love her not allowing me to eat snacks when i very young.
i love her telling stories to me during afternoon naps
i love her for cutting fruits-(water)melons after afternoon naps
i love her saying that she missed me after two day of myself going to my mother side de grandparents house. and asking me if i missed her.( of course i had to say yes.)
i love her for all the things. good or bad.
but she's gone now..
i love grandpa
i love him being old
i love him being stubborn, too stubborn,
i love him for scolding my dad because of some stupid, not worth to scold problems
i love him for being a principal when he was 20 years old
i love him being a secondary maths teacher after that
i love him for giving my dad a chance to be a teacher( my dad had no choice)
i love him for he's my grandpa
i love my sister.
i love her buying things for me
i love her quarrelling with me when she can
i love her being messy( like im not)
i love her giving me cash when i needed it so much to buy presents for my frens
i love her fighting with me
i love her for scolding me becuz i quarrels with her boyfren for fun.
i love her cuz she's my sister!

i love all my relatives.....

Labels: for my dearest daddy the best day-taylor swift, introducing a beautiful song

got something new for me today
'AAABBBDDDBBBAAADDDAAABBBDDDD',
means long time no C (see).
heehee
laaaaaaooooooooz